Nikki Glaser returned to host the Golden Globes for the second year in a row — and if you watched, you know she didn’t hold back. But apparently, the jokes we heard on Sunday night were just the tip of the comedic iceberg.
Miss hostess with the most, Nikki Glaser, stopped by The Howard Stern Show and revealed the jokes she didn’t get to say during the three‑hour ceremony. And in true INYIM Media fashion, we pulled together the sharpest, spiciest, and most unfiltered gems she dropped.
Sydney Sweeney
“Tonight is a night of celebration but we can’t ignore it’s a weird time in Hollywood. You know, people just aren’t going to the theaters to see things.
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No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.And if you don’t believe me, there was a movie this year where Sydney Sweeney played a lesbian who just bounced around in tiny shorts for two hours and it made $14.”
All Things Sean Penn
“Sean Penn is nominated tonight. I’m assuming for ‘Best Neck Veins.’”
She continued:
“He’s the defiant last tree standing in a rainforest.”
And then:
“I just saw Sean Penn and maybe he’s taking The Substance wrong.”
Leonardo DiCaprio
“Sean Penn, Benicio del Toro, and Leonardo DiCaprio are all here tonight for the category ‘Least Eyes.’”
Then she zeroed in on Leo:
“He always looks like he’s squinting. Leo, why are you always squinting? I assume it’s to read your girlfriend’s ID. Just making sure the year starts with a 2.”
Timothée Chalamet’s Sex Life
“Amy Poehler is here for her podcast Good Hang, which is what Timothée Chalamet says after sex.”
Julia Roberts — After The Hunt
“Julia Roberts is nominated for After The Hunt. I don’t know what it’s about, but I’m assuming the hunt was to find someone who’s seen it.”
Jonathan Bailey — People’s Sexiest Man Alive
“Jonathan Bailey is the first openly gay man to be named Sexiest Man Alive by People magazine.
At first I was like, ‘Do we really need to say openly?’ And then I looked at the list of past winners and I was like, ‘Oh yeah, we do.’”
Jeff Goldblum — Apartments.com King
“Jeff Goldblum is here tonight. Not because he’s nominated, just because they were shooting an ad for Apartments.com down the street and he wandered in.”
She added:
“He probably hasn’t lived in an apartment since he starred in The Fly in 1986.”
Brad Pitt — F1 and Hollywood Age Math
“Brad Pitt is nominated for his role in F1 tonight. See, that’s what I love about Hollywood.
When a man turns 60, he gets to play a race car driver. Meanwhile, after 35, every role for a woman is ‘tired mom who hates her life.’”
Glaser lastly divulged it’s difficult to abandon a joke. She’s come to accept it saying: ‘Things do live on in some way and maybe sometimes a joke is just for the room’.
Below: the uncut, raw feed the broadcast didn’t have time (or nerve) to air.
CREDITS
Words: INYIM Media Source: The Howard Stern Show Host: Nikki Glasere
What did you think of Nikki’s uncut jokes? Drop your thoughts below — we’re reading everything.
